On Witnessing Spring

Alexandria, VA – Now midway into my 86th year, I have lived to witness another spring.

In early spring, as I looked from my window at the still dormant trees I identified with a mother cat. By grooming her newborn kittens, she stimulates their circulation (among other things). It was as if by “licking” the trees with my eyes, I could will them to life. I know they would have turned green without me watching, but I like to think I helped.

Yet there are parts of the changing seasons that chronicle my aging.

I used to say that aging was nipping away at the edges of my well-being. Now it’s like a frontal assault. I have bouts of neuropathy that come without warning and leave me unable to walk for minutes at a time. I suffer from stiffness and the pain of arthritis in both knees. The body that housed the Nina I used to know has disappeared. I don’t much like the body that houses Nina now.

Perhaps some twenty years ago, I smiled when offered a senior discount at a restaurant without asking. Another time, to be polite, I accepted an offer of help loading an Ikea purchase into the trunk of my car, even though I didn’t need it. Recently, as I walked to my car, a woman noticed my hesitation in stepping up to the curb and offered to walk with me and help open my car door. I thanked her and assured her I was okay. I look more frail than I feel. Except sometimes. Sometimes I feel so frail I want to retreat to my home and yard and stay there.

Speaking of the yard, I still mow the lawn. To stop would signal an unacceptable level of defeat. I still hand-pull weeds. I carefully plan that task – knee pads to kneel on, a collapsible one-step stool for initial leverage, and a repurposed fallen tree branch to help me stand the rest of the way. It may be an impressive feat to watch, but it is not a pretty one.

In an attempt to slow this aging thing, I work out five days a week.   I go to  Planet Fitness for four and take part in a weekly Fit For Life class at the Kingstowne Active Senior Center.

Besides yard work, I continue to create mosaic art. During the pandemic, when I couldn’t exhibit my work elsewhere, I installed a hanging system and track lighting in my home. That way I could exhibit my work and that of Steve Halperson, my son and partner-in-art. I call it Serenity Gallery.

When I retired from Tisara Photography, a friend asked what I would do next. I looked up at a mosaic I had been admiring on the wall of the restaurant. I told her that I wanted to learn to make mosaics and that I wanted to write the stories of everyday things. I’m grateful to be doing both. Sometimes I am discouraged by the art I produce. Every so often one is selected for display in the Art League gallery, which buoys me.  Often I think I will run out of memories and musings. But I continue to be astounded by what I don’t know and that inspires me to learn and write.

I am grateful to the Art League gallery, Mary Wadland, and The Zebra for the platform to share my writing. And I am grateful to have witnessed yet another spring.

Mosaic artist-photographer Nina Tisara is the founder of Living Legends of Alexandria

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