Holiday 2013 Quotables

“Christmas isn’t a season. It’s a feeling.”
– Edna Ferber

“Christmas doesn’t come from a store, maybe Christmas perhaps means a little bit more….”
– Dr. Seuss, How the Grinch Stole Christmas

“One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don’t clean it up too quickly.”
– Andy Rooney

“The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn’t for any religious reasons. They couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin.”
– Jay Leno

“Thanksgiving dinners take 18 hours to prepare. They are consumed in 12 minutes. Half-times take 12 minutes. This is not coincidence.”
– Erma Bombeck

“After a good dinner, one can forgive anybody, even one’s own relations.”
– Oscar Wilde, A Woman of No Importance

“I like football. I find it’s an exciting strategic game. It’s a great way to avoid conversation with your family at Thanksgiving.”
– Craig Ferguson

“A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works.”
– Bill Vaughan

“Americans never quit.”
– Douglas MacArthur

We’ll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail.”
– Dave Barry

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